I feel like such a hipster today. I went to starbucks to get my iced frappuccino. After that, I made my mind up that when I get home, I'd blog. Then I'd check on my photos on my iPod. All the while, I walked wearing some Birkenstock sandals, a tank top underneath my button up shirt (only buttoned up halfway), cargo pants, a satchel hitting my side, and my hair down and flowing in the wind. Such a hipster moment. The thing is, I didn't realize it was totally hipster until I said it aloud and got out of my car.
Anyways, I was talking to my friend the other day and we got onto the subject of "My Little Pony." I told her how amazing I thought it was (which it is, by the way- you should all watch it) and we started talking about our favorite characters. It then came to our minds to figure out who we were as the ponies. She said I was like Twilight Sparkle- the one who reads and studies all the time, never makes new friends unless her other friends introduce them, and has her best friend with her all the time and has to get them out of trouble. When I finally analyzed all of this, I came to a realization- I'm Twilight. Completely and utterly. It's so weird that I end up being all the main, OCD, studious characters, but I guess it makes sense. I took a quiz about which Nightmare Before Christmas character I was for fun- I was Jack. I'm Twilight Sparkles. Apparently, I look and act like Velma Dinkley from Scooby Doo. I end up being all of those characters.
Lately, I've noticed that I've been a little more spastic than usual. I don't know if it's because summer's only 3 days away, or because of my life going pretty well of late, or because I just am. I honestly don't know, but what can a girl do? It's odd, really- all my years in school, I looked forward to summer vacation, but this year, I'm kinda looking forward to it, but not really. I don't wanna leave my friends, but I wanna go to South Padre Island. I don't want a friend of mine to move to North Carolina, but I want my cousin to move in already. I don't want another friend to be in Puerto Rico for 2 months, but I want to have someone to always facetime with. I don't want my friends going to different campuses, but I'm ready to reboot my reputation. I'm a little torn, but I know there's nothing I can do. Everything has it's pros and cons, but I know I'll never be able to even them out. It's cool, though- I know I'll live. I just don't know what the difficulty of my life will be after this summer. I'm sure it'll still be relatively easy, but I just don't want certain people to leave. I only don't want them to leave because I have a fear of them forgetting me. I don't want to be forgotten- I don't want to be alone- I'm just a bit insecure about that whole thing.
Any time I'm alone and not doing anything, I find myself hounded with past mistakes, past conversations, past heartbreaks, what I should've done, could've done, didn't do. I find that I become a graveyard for my past and a burnt map about my future. I become something that I never wanted to be- a lonely girl, stuck thinking about how I should've been more understanding, how I could've been a better friend, how I need to change everything. I need friends- I need something to do- I need. I need to
always
do
something.
I guess I figured out how I always end up being those characters. On the Jack Skellington quiz, it said that i was "very curious and persistent. You obsess over some things and once something gets into you head, you can't let it go. You like to be alone, but are social sometimes too. You are a leader and not a follower and don't think things through sometimes. You are the main character." I know I normally don't think about it, but this description is pretty spot on. It's odd, really- I know it in my heart that anyone reading this post will think I'm the weirdest person in the universe. I don't mind, but I just think that I will end up causing many arguements in my many posts.
Sigh.
I love causing mischief. >:D
Sunday, May 27, 2012
Wednesday, May 2, 2012
Switching campuses
It's a Wednesday.
May 5th.
I'm not looking forward to changing schools for next year.
So many of my friends (close friends) are going to completely different schools than me. Some friends aren't, of course, and I thank heaven that they aren't. But the ones that are hit close to home. I've never made so many friends that I can just be my frumpy-old self around, and next semester is taking away a good chunk of that joy I felt. What can I do? Nothing.
That's really what hurts the most.
I'm not able to change anything, for better or worse. My friend is moving to Austin, another may be moving back to Puerto Rico, another is in Tennessee, and many are going to specialized campuses. It's not that I'm not happy for them- I am! I just wish my school had all the things they love so we'd stay together.
Too many dreams, though.
Other than that, life's ok. I'm about to eat sun chips. Going to Orange Leaf on friday with a friend. I have a concert on Saturday. And I recently bought Fun.'s albums. So I guess, if you exclude that rant on school switching, life's amazing! And I guess I'll still have a large group of friends at my new campus, so I'm sure I'll be able to bear it.
Right?
May 5th.
I'm not looking forward to changing schools for next year.
So many of my friends (close friends) are going to completely different schools than me. Some friends aren't, of course, and I thank heaven that they aren't. But the ones that are hit close to home. I've never made so many friends that I can just be my frumpy-old self around, and next semester is taking away a good chunk of that joy I felt. What can I do? Nothing.
That's really what hurts the most.
I'm not able to change anything, for better or worse. My friend is moving to Austin, another may be moving back to Puerto Rico, another is in Tennessee, and many are going to specialized campuses. It's not that I'm not happy for them- I am! I just wish my school had all the things they love so we'd stay together.
Too many dreams, though.
Other than that, life's ok. I'm about to eat sun chips. Going to Orange Leaf on friday with a friend. I have a concert on Saturday. And I recently bought Fun.'s albums. So I guess, if you exclude that rant on school switching, life's amazing! And I guess I'll still have a large group of friends at my new campus, so I'm sure I'll be able to bear it.
Right?
Saturday, April 28, 2012
Awkward conversations, nicknames, etc.
Not to disappoint you, but today I'm not going to post a picture. Honestly, today I just want to write. Write about junk. About stupid things that probably don't mean anything. About how socially awkward I am over the phone. About those weird silences you have between one of your best friends when you realize you have nothing to say or hear- you just stand there. About lord of the rings. About life, essentially. What can I say?
So I called a friend of mine today for some science stuff I needed and, needless to say, I was awkward. Here's how it kind of went down.
*Phone starts to ring- I get all spazzy. Phone rings again- I get even more spastic.*
*Friend answers* "Hello?"
*I go all out and stumble over my words like I do when I call a family member I haven't talked to for months* "Heeeeeeeeyyyy...!"
"Hey."
"So......It seems that I've misplaced my science guidelines and I was wondering if you have them..."
"Oh, so, do you have Mrs. Kind (I have to come up with pseudo names)?"
*I give a dazed look at my wall as he finally come to realization that I have the class before him* "Oh wait, you have Mrs. Evil- oh yeah."
*I start laughing with him* "Yeah I have her just like you." Kinda why I called you, I thought.
"Right, well, why don't I just take pictures of them and then send them to you?"
*I stop looking for a pen and a notebook* "........yeah, that's a good idea."
"Ok, on your phone or iPod?"
"iPod would be great." I sound like a goober ordering in a resturant!!!! What the fudge-ing freakin' fudge is wrong with me?!?!?!?
"Ok, so I-"
"Yeah so I- oh sorry..."
"No, it's fine you go ahead."
"Oh, well, so, do you wanna talk 'cause i meanconversationsaregreat and y'knowitwouldbeok....."
"I'm kinda watching a movie right now......"
"Oh, gosh, uh, well, yeah.......you should probably go."
*Awkward laughter is shared over the phone, awkward goodbyes, and a phone slammed into my forehead while I quietly think and say "OhgoshughI'msuchanidiotwhydidn'tIjustcallsomeoneelseisn'titonline?!?!? UGH!!!!"*
Y'know what's even more horrible about this? I just went online to my school website and when I went to my teachers, the rubric I needed was there. I just printed it out. I just received a face palm.
In the background, while I'm typing this (about to dork out here :D), the backstage documentary of lord of the rings is playing. This is one of the few documentaries I really enjoy listening to. I've heard knife-making videos, 3-D movie backstage junk, all sorts of boring things, but this documentary is the one that I will actually stop, sit, watch, and LISTEN to. I love it- one of the reasons is because of Dominic Monaghan. He plays Merry/Merri (I'm not quite sure how to spell his name) in all of the movies. There's actually a reason my username is Merri Skywalker.
As you've probably all guessed, Merri Skywalker is not my real name. I have Merri as my first name because of a time some friends and I were watching Lord of the Rings and we all decided who we were in the fellowship- I was Merri. Skywalker is because in 5th grade (and today, honestly) I wanted everyone to call me Skywalker. My first name, if it were re-arranged, would spell Anakin, and it doesn't help that I'm a star wars junkie- I wanted all of my friends to call me Skywalker!!! I thought it was cool- heck, I still think it's cool!!!!
I'm sorry that this post is just so long, but for some reason, a lot is going through my mind. School junk, friends, procrastinating, being an idiot. I mean, you only have one life, so why not just go all out and live your life??? I know too many people that are afraid to live out their life. Life is there to live and laugh and love- not to cower in a corner of desolation and despair. What can I say? I have so many stupid, crazy things I want to do before I die, I can't afford to live my life in fear.... :)
So I called a friend of mine today for some science stuff I needed and, needless to say, I was awkward. Here's how it kind of went down.
*Phone starts to ring- I get all spazzy. Phone rings again- I get even more spastic.*
*Friend answers* "Hello?"
*I go all out and stumble over my words like I do when I call a family member I haven't talked to for months* "Heeeeeeeeyyyy...!"
"Hey."
"So......It seems that I've misplaced my science guidelines and I was wondering if you have them..."
"Oh, so, do you have Mrs. Kind (I have to come up with pseudo names)?"
*I give a dazed look at my wall as he finally come to realization that I have the class before him* "Oh wait, you have Mrs. Evil- oh yeah."
*I start laughing with him* "Yeah I have her just like you." Kinda why I called you, I thought.
"Right, well, why don't I just take pictures of them and then send them to you?"
*I stop looking for a pen and a notebook* "........yeah, that's a good idea."
"Ok, on your phone or iPod?"
"iPod would be great." I sound like a goober ordering in a resturant!!!! What the fudge-ing freakin' fudge is wrong with me?!?!?!?
"Ok, so I-"
"Yeah so I- oh sorry..."
"No, it's fine you go ahead."
"Oh, well, so, do you wanna talk 'cause i meanconversationsaregreat and y'knowitwouldbeok....."
"I'm kinda watching a movie right now......"
"Oh, gosh, uh, well, yeah.......you should probably go."
*Awkward laughter is shared over the phone, awkward goodbyes, and a phone slammed into my forehead while I quietly think and say "OhgoshughI'msuchanidiotwhydidn'tIjustcallsomeoneelseisn'titonline?!?!? UGH!!!!"*
Y'know what's even more horrible about this? I just went online to my school website and when I went to my teachers, the rubric I needed was there. I just printed it out. I just received a face palm.
In the background, while I'm typing this (about to dork out here :D), the backstage documentary of lord of the rings is playing. This is one of the few documentaries I really enjoy listening to. I've heard knife-making videos, 3-D movie backstage junk, all sorts of boring things, but this documentary is the one that I will actually stop, sit, watch, and LISTEN to. I love it- one of the reasons is because of Dominic Monaghan. He plays Merry/Merri (I'm not quite sure how to spell his name) in all of the movies. There's actually a reason my username is Merri Skywalker.
As you've probably all guessed, Merri Skywalker is not my real name. I have Merri as my first name because of a time some friends and I were watching Lord of the Rings and we all decided who we were in the fellowship- I was Merri. Skywalker is because in 5th grade (and today, honestly) I wanted everyone to call me Skywalker. My first name, if it were re-arranged, would spell Anakin, and it doesn't help that I'm a star wars junkie- I wanted all of my friends to call me Skywalker!!! I thought it was cool- heck, I still think it's cool!!!!
I'm sorry that this post is just so long, but for some reason, a lot is going through my mind. School junk, friends, procrastinating, being an idiot. I mean, you only have one life, so why not just go all out and live your life??? I know too many people that are afraid to live out their life. Life is there to live and laugh and love- not to cower in a corner of desolation and despair. What can I say? I have so many stupid, crazy things I want to do before I die, I can't afford to live my life in fear.... :)
Sunday, April 15, 2012
Some more pics!!!!
So again, I'm bored and I downloaded the blogger app on my phone, so now I'm able to post anywhere. Short post now though because I got some stuff I need to do. So the 1st picture is of Nate Ruess, the lead singer of fun. I LOVE the way he sings!!!! The 2nd pic is of my little chihuahua violet- she realy is the chunky. So....yeah!!! Hope you like them- please comment on what's good and bad!
The artist,
__________________
Saturday, April 14, 2012
My friends (5 and Raze) and the torn emotions
Hey hey hey again, fellow bloggers!!!! I figure "it's late- I'm bored- I still have stuff I need to do- why not blog?" And so here I am!!!! The second picture is of my friends 5 and Raze, sitting at a desk drawing (Raze is kneeling, not 5 years old). The first one I did just as a concept sketch (I love drawing people that look one way but feel another- it gives the picture more depth). What she's saying is "Words can't describe the way I feel!! If only you could perceive a glimpse of my emotion!!" She's saying this, I guess, with a smile to throw off suspicion when in reality, she's in more pain than ever before. I don't really know why I've been drawing things like this so much now- I guess I just kinda like it. I've always been the sort of person to contain all emotion and then, when I'm with a close friend, just go ballistic and explode. But I guess that's
just
the
way
I
am....
No changing that (for better or worse).
Yours truly,
____________
just
the
way
I
am....
No changing that (for better or worse).
Yours truly,
____________
Saturday, April 7, 2012
2 more pictures! :D
Hey-oh, guys!!! Yeah, so, I figured I should go ahead and post some more pictures of stuff! So, the girl with the screaming shadow (it says "I've never been happier") was actually for the April instagram challenge (photo sharing app) and I had to do a shadow. Well, I've never really been good at shadow play, so I figure I ought to draw it instead! The second picture (of a ranger and one of the elves [for lord of the rings fans]) was merely for fun. I apologize for the whole no paragraph thing- post from iPod again. ;\ Anyhow, tell me what you think of the pics!
-the artist.
-the artist.
Friday, April 6, 2012
"5," Mr. Rogers, and 7th grade goatees.
Let's see....what has happened in the past few days that is worthy of posting about?
AH! Here's something.
I was talking to a friend of mine (we call him "5-" don't ask me why) and we always go to get our lunch together. Well, just the other day, I went with him as usual and he brought $5 to pay for his food. Now normally, he would put it on his tab for later dates, but that day, he wanted change back. Apparently, the cashier was caught off guard and when he asked, all of us in the line waited for about 5 minutes.
Needless to say, it was the most awkward 5 minutes I've ever experienced.
He and I stood there, in silence, just shooting each other with mind bullets and glances that said everything that needed to be said- "Of all days, why would you choose the day with the longest line to ask for change back?" See, the change rolls that had all the quarters he needed weren't open yet and somehow, the cashier had trouble opening them. I turned to my left to see all the people with their spiteful glances, and trust me when I say it was a very short glance. I must've had the fear of God in my eyes, because "5" and I simply stood there, awkwardly coughing to dismiss the silence, only to find that we were utter failures at getting rid of awkwardness. If anything, it made things even MORE awkward than before!!! When he finally got all of his change, the most excruciating time of our young lives were finally over and when I bid him goodbye, I paid my money, but I told her to put the change on my tab and quickly walked away from the line.
That moment of my life will never be forgotten.
So lately, I've been addicted to Olan Rogers videos and I find myself sounding more and more like him as time goes on. It isn't necessarily bad, but when you don't even realize you're quoting something, it shows that you're starting to lose your mind. I mean, I think it's a little early on in my life to be going insane, but what can I say- I've always been an early bloomer (great). I love Olan Rogers and all, but when did I start sounding more like him instead of myself? My dad keeps pointing it out. "Aw, again? I mean, really? Freaking AGAIN?!!?"
"Stop it, Olan Rogers!"
I'M NOT OLAN ROGERS, DANG IT!!!! OLAN ROGERS IS OLAN ROGERS!!!!
Gosh darn it!
Well, anyhow, just Wednesday (4/4/2012) I was talking to some friends of mine and somehow, we got to the conversation of goatees. Here's what happened- I was standing with some friends (Sofiee, Lieamsh [nickname I made up for him], and Raze [another nickname], but he was kinda just on the side) and we were just kinda chilling, waiting for our rides to come by and pick us up. Randomly, Lieamsh says "I hate it when there are people like 7th graders or something that have goatees when they can barely grow facial hair."
"I know! I mean they're, like, these little people that can grow, like, three curly hairs and they just keep them there!" replied Sofiee.
"YES! I honestly just wanna take a razor to their faces and just chop it off!"
"Yeah, I mean, I don't see a point to it. The same with balding guys- honestly, if they're balding, they should shave it all off," said I, and so the topic was actually a very interesting topic. Really- you should bring goatees to your friends sometime and see where the conversation goes.
So yeah.
I think that's all I got for you right now.
......Yep.
-Yours truly,
________________
AH! Here's something.
I was talking to a friend of mine (we call him "5-" don't ask me why) and we always go to get our lunch together. Well, just the other day, I went with him as usual and he brought $5 to pay for his food. Now normally, he would put it on his tab for later dates, but that day, he wanted change back. Apparently, the cashier was caught off guard and when he asked, all of us in the line waited for about 5 minutes.
Needless to say, it was the most awkward 5 minutes I've ever experienced.
He and I stood there, in silence, just shooting each other with mind bullets and glances that said everything that needed to be said- "Of all days, why would you choose the day with the longest line to ask for change back?" See, the change rolls that had all the quarters he needed weren't open yet and somehow, the cashier had trouble opening them. I turned to my left to see all the people with their spiteful glances, and trust me when I say it was a very short glance. I must've had the fear of God in my eyes, because "5" and I simply stood there, awkwardly coughing to dismiss the silence, only to find that we were utter failures at getting rid of awkwardness. If anything, it made things even MORE awkward than before!!! When he finally got all of his change, the most excruciating time of our young lives were finally over and when I bid him goodbye, I paid my money, but I told her to put the change on my tab and quickly walked away from the line.
That moment of my life will never be forgotten.
So lately, I've been addicted to Olan Rogers videos and I find myself sounding more and more like him as time goes on. It isn't necessarily bad, but when you don't even realize you're quoting something, it shows that you're starting to lose your mind. I mean, I think it's a little early on in my life to be going insane, but what can I say- I've always been an early bloomer (great). I love Olan Rogers and all, but when did I start sounding more like him instead of myself? My dad keeps pointing it out. "Aw, again? I mean, really? Freaking AGAIN?!!?"
"Stop it, Olan Rogers!"
I'M NOT OLAN ROGERS, DANG IT!!!! OLAN ROGERS IS OLAN ROGERS!!!!
Gosh darn it!
Well, anyhow, just Wednesday (4/4/2012) I was talking to some friends of mine and somehow, we got to the conversation of goatees. Here's what happened- I was standing with some friends (Sofiee, Lieamsh [nickname I made up for him], and Raze [another nickname], but he was kinda just on the side) and we were just kinda chilling, waiting for our rides to come by and pick us up. Randomly, Lieamsh says "I hate it when there are people like 7th graders or something that have goatees when they can barely grow facial hair."
"I know! I mean they're, like, these little people that can grow, like, three curly hairs and they just keep them there!" replied Sofiee.
"YES! I honestly just wanna take a razor to their faces and just chop it off!"
"Yeah, I mean, I don't see a point to it. The same with balding guys- honestly, if they're balding, they should shave it all off," said I, and so the topic was actually a very interesting topic. Really- you should bring goatees to your friends sometime and see where the conversation goes.
So yeah.
I think that's all I got for you right now.
......Yep.
-Yours truly,
________________
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